
This is a big year of transition for me. I am moving next month and am positioning myself for major career change. In a big way. Different industry and different lifestyle: a true Escape from Cubical Nation.
It is both exciting …..

and, well….scary as hell …..

A few days ago, I was chatting with a friend, X, who asked for status on my job/career search. I told X that I’m doing heavy due diligence/research, networking meetings/coffees, and reading everything pertinent I can get my hands on. Also, the most important conference and networking event of the year (for the industry I would like to work in) is coming up in a few weeks. It’s not held in the city I live in.
X promptly said, “you’re going, right?” Me: ”No, I can’t justify the cost of attending this close to my move, which is also next month.”
X urged me to strongly consider and quickly outlined the benefits of attending, especially this year of transition. It would be a “wise investment” in myself and my future. Even if I determined that the industry was not for me, it’s a win/win trip.
Before we parted, X to me: “Do whatever you have to do to attend that conference. I think it is really important for you and your future.”

Upon reflection that afternoon, I thought: I can make it happen, but I wouldn’t feel good about it. The cost of doing it would take away (at least initially), from the enjoyment of really being present and fuel my self-talk: ”Girl, what the eff are you doing??”
I awoke the next morning to a message from X: ”I really think you need to do this. I would love to pay for this for you. You will never know until you do. This is such an important time for you.” Wow. Talk about an Angel Investor.
I thought about this while I made my green tea.

X’s message moved me beyond words. I felt so grateful and empowered by it. It completely energized and exhilarated me.
“Everything comes to us that belongs to us if we create the capacity to receive it.” - Rabindranath Tagore
I responded and noted how overwhelmed I was with gratitude for X’s generosity. I would definitely accept the offer. It meant so much to me.
What didn’t occur to me initially (until I heard back), was how much it meant to X that I accept this offer. Frankly, it didn’t occur to me to not accept. (Apologies for the double negative.) But I can think of many past times when that was not the case. This got me thinking about giving and receiving….
“For it is in giving that we receive.” - St. Francis of Assisi
They are necessary counterparts. Like inhaling and exhaling. And, speaking and listening.

Receiving is an energetic match to giving. Just like when someone speaks, a true listener is giving back as much as they are receiving.
The often quoted bible phrase “it is more blessed to give than to receive”, which we are all familiar with, places the importance on giving. That half of the pair is preferable to the receiving half? Giving does feel good, yes? But, what about receiving and accepting the good in our lives? Does it mean that receiving needs to be the opposite? Why do we often struggle with with receiving and accepting good?
For me, it has boiled down to two reasons:
- It taps into our vulnerability. Big time. Particularly when it comes unexpectedly or at a time when you are already feeling vulnerable. That can leave us feeling “unable to do for myself” or , yikes…”needy”. This prompts the old feeling of powerlessness. {For more on vulnerability, the best 18 minutes you can take out of your day is to watch this TED talk by one of my mentors and a local rock-star here in Houston: Brene Brown.}

- Secondly, it can give the perception of being “dependent” on someone. So much emphasis in our culture today is on our independence and self-reliance that we often forget that we can’t “do it all” and there is no shame in needing help. Usually the messages drilled into us are along these lines……

This line of thinking keeps our therapists in business.
In receiving graciously, we honor an act of giving with our acceptance. If I say “no thanks…..”, or simply don’t acknowledge – it is, in essence, shutting a door and denying them the opportunity to serve. Why not open that door, give others the opportunity to serve and for us to connect? What could be better?
To my Angel Investor, it is with a grateful heart that I embrace this upcoming event. Thank you…

And, may we continue to lift each other up. xo
~
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